Jonah HexReviewed By: Chris LawtonI wanted to like
Jonah Hex. I really did. I love westerns, and, as a comic,
Jonah Hex has told some really solid western stories. Unfortunately, the same can’t be said for the recent movie. Aside from a good performance or two, everything else about the movie fails on multiple levels.
The title character, Jonah Hex (
Josh Brolin), is a cynical bounty hunter, in the old west, who has been horribly scarred on the right side of his face. He seeks vengeance against General Quentin Turnbull (
John Malkovich), who killed Hex’s wife and kid. While Hex wants revenge, Turnbull actually has his eyes set on America as a whole. He seeks to destroy the country with a stolen super-cannon, which is capable of leveling an entire city in seconds.
Where should I start? Well, let’s start with the good.
Brolin,
Malkovich and
Michael Fassbender, who plays Turnbull’s right hand man, Burke, all turn in excellent performances. There’s not really a single bad thing I can say about any of these three, except maybe, that’s it’s occasionally hard to understand Brolin—though, that’s really more the fault of the prosthetic scars, than his performance.
On the other side of the coin, we’ve got
Megan Fox. I mean, wow… she’s sultry and hot in this movie. But, when it comes right down to it, her performance is God-awful. She delivers each line robotically and with zero emotion. Even the tender scenes between her and Hex feel forced and unbelievable. I haven’t seen screen chemistry this bad in a very, very long time.
It’s not helped by a mess of a plot either. Okay, Hex’s story of vengeance and Turnbull stealing the super-cannon—that’s all good. No problems there. But, then they start forcing a bunch of side-plots that are never really resolved. For example,
Fox’s character is seen saving her whoring money to someday buy some land and get out of the business. And they make a big deal out of her wanting to do this on her own, without help from anyone. But, the storyline disappears halfway through the movie, and it’s never resolved.
But, the worst offender would have to be the needless supernatural side-plot. See, Hex can talk to the dead. Why? I don’t know. They kind of give it a half-hearted explanation—something about him coming close to death, so death listens to him, or something. Ultimately, the entire concept is pointless. They use it to explain why Hex is such a good bounty hunter. But, that’s just stupid. In the comics, he was a good bounty hunter, because he grew up in an Apache camp as the adopted son of the chief. He learned to hunt and track, and he uses those skills to find his bounties.
For some reason, it feels like the filmmakers felt the raised by Apache story wasn’t interesting enough—because, it’s not even mentioned in the movie. We’re given no backstory for Hex, other than that he fought as a Confederate soldier in the Civil War.
But beyond that, the supernatural plotline actually ruins the concept of Jonah Hex for me, on the whole. I’ve always loved the comic book, because it’s such a good, down-to-earth Western comic. Yeah, some of the more recent books have had him fight some supernatural stuff. But, the classic Jonah Hex stories were always about the character and his place within the lawless world of the Old West.
Story aside, another reason this movie fails would have to be the direction. This is director
Jimmy Hayward’s first live-action film, and it shows. Aside from Fox’s wooden performance, the events of the movie just seem strung together with no rhyme or reason. Scenes just seem to happen, with no explanation. And the audience is left wondering what just happened.
For example, I was alone in the theater when I watched it. There were a few people in front of me, but largely, I didn’t have anyone with me. So, naturally, I didn’t make any jokes throughout the movie and actually watched it. Despite the fact that I was paying attention, I still had no idea the final fight between Hex and Turnbull was happening. I saw that Hex was fighting some guy, but you never actually saw his assailant’s face.
It wasn’t until the very end of the fight when I saw Turnbull’s face and thought, “Oh, I get it. That’s the final fight. Lame.”
The production is decent. The scar prosthetic on
Brolin’s face may make it hard for him to talk, but it looks great. The rest of the effects are well-done as well. Make no mistake, this movie is very pretty to look at.
The soundtrack is also worth mentioning. Scored by heavy metal band,
Mastodon, the music shifts from moody to rocking from scene to scene, and does a great job driving the movie along, despite the poor direction.
When it comes right down to it,
Jonah Hex had the potential to be a great horror-western. The comic is filled with compelling characters and excellent stories. Unfortunately, the film version throws all that out and suffers severely for it. You’d be much better off waiting to rent this one. It’s not even worth the price of a matinee.
